Saturday, June 6, 2009

Maybe we got a little heads up that everything was gonna be okay.

Kolton's blood sugar was a little low so they sent him back to the N.I.C.U. to monitor it. I awoke the next morning to find my baby was still not with me. His pediatrician came in and said that he would have to stay due to some fluid in his lungs. So I asked him, "Are you telling me I'm going home with out my baby?" He said he would be able to come home in a few days and this was a normal thing. Leaving the hospital I felt like something else was wrong and they were not telling me or they just didn't know which scared me even more. I received a phone call around midnight that same night. It was the pediatrician on the other end and he then began to speak these words, "There's something wrong with the baby's heart and needs surgery. We need to transfer him tonight, how soon can you get down here?" I dropped the phone in disbelief feeling like I might pass out and overwhelmed with tears I began sobbing. I say sobbing because this was such a deeper cry like I had never felt. Through the tears I tried to explain to Billy and we rushed to the hospital. He was taken by ambulance that night and would have been air lifted if not for the weather. How was I going to be strong enough to endure this? Why did God let this happen? Will he even live? These were the questions that came to my mind right away. When we got to Los Angeles Children's Hospital, surgery was put on hold due to a brain bleed which was most likely due to the vacuum used at birth. We waited 3 weeks which felt like an eternity.


  1. Poor lil guy! My heart is with you! My son also a previous tenant of the NICU, was 14 weeks pre-mature. 129 days of constant worry. Good Luck!!